The Devil Is the Numbers
July 29, 2016
Written by: Becky Novotne
Damn! That was the first word out of my mouth as I stepped on that stupid scale. I was feeling so good just knowing that I had to have lost weight and inches. Damn. I didn’t lose weight. I really didn’t lose any inches in the areas that I really want to lose inches. In fact, pretty sure I gained at least 6 or 8 pounds since I last stepped on that stupid scale. I felt defeated. I was really bummed. I went home sulking to myself.
“What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I not losing weight? You must not be working out hard enough. You’re slacking. You need to do better. You are wasting your time. You should just quit. Do you know how much money you are spending to not lose weight? That’s a lot of money. If you quit, you would have so much more time to do stuff at home. Are all those people that have been commenting on how good I look just saying it to be “nice” or do they really mean it?”
I can be pretty mean to Me. It’s the same Me that just worked my ass of in class, dripping sweat, pushing myself to lift those weights. The same Me that did 80lb chest presses. The Badass Me.
I have to ignore the numbers. Yes, they are a measure of success in a way. But they are just numbers. The numbers don’t know what I do every day. They don’t know how hard I work out. They don’t know that I had a great fit test. They don’t know that I can do sit ups and push-ups now; something I couldn’t do when I started. They don’t know that I am healthy. They are just numbers.
There is no scale that measures every time I walk thru the doors at the gym. No scale that can measure my happiness. There is no scale that can measure the enjoyment I see in my son’s eyes when we go on an adventure-one before I would have never considered because I was so out of shape. There is no scale that can measure the loving looks I get from my husband as he is looking at my new transforming body.
So, Devil scale, Kiss my BADASS! YOU DON’T KNOW ME!